In the future, all cars will be as stylish and intuitive as my 2004 Toyota Prius. I feel that I owe you all at least a thousand words on the majesty of this car. The universe keeps sending me signs that I need to write this piece about this Citroen DS of the aughts. The last signal was a 2CV on a flatbed truck on the Baltimore Washington Parkway.
Today is not the day for that piece. It's the day for another observation about the future.
My mother died about a week ago. The police entered her home and found that she had passed away in the evening. The police were incredibly helpful and compassionate but they did one thing that surprised me. They found my mother's wallet in her purse and removed her driver's license.
After expressing all of the regular human sentiments about the loss of my mother, the officers added that they would make sure the driver's license made its way back to the MVA without delay. They seemed quite proud of their attention to this detail. I was proud for them.
In the distant future, priests from the Temple of the Great and Mighty Fraternal Order of P'lice will help souls find rest by guiding their Holy Driver's License back to the Shrine of the Motor Vehicle Administration. People who die apart from their License will doom their souls to roam the earth in the back of a taxicab. People who die without ever performing the Sacrament of the License would wind up in Purgatory until their soul could parallel park to a seraph's satisfaction.
Perhaps these souls are among us already. It would explain a great many squeaks in the city's taxi fleet. I rest easy knowing that my mother's soul is at peace somewhere at the Great Drive-In Movie in the beyond. I may park next to her some day.
